This and That
Anthony
The flowers you see-periwinkle-are Anthony the cat in bloom. In fact, every plant in the picture has him.
I see you roll your eyes AND the thought cloud-what a nut job…..
Well, that flower pot has Anthony’s ashes in it and thus -it is him in bloom.
Anthony, along with his brother Luke started their journey as my first pets after ages, in 2017. They also started the journey as Annie and Lyla…in the tremendously gender fluid ways cats have. Of course, they soon flowed into being Anthony and Luke.
They were our great joy and happiness and our lives revolved around them. Anthony especially was chatty and among all residents of our home, there were many conversations and discussions-specially between Gumi-the mainstay of our home, and him. However, as they grew, they started spending more and more time outside the house, often not returning for days on end.
Eventually, they left altogether-Lyla-Luke we never saw again. He just did a great job of disappearing, but I know he’s alive somewhere,being a diva.
Anthony, though, we met frequently while walking around the colony. In fact, he came home too, a couple of times, only to leave quickly again after a day or so of pampering. He had found these two households who looked after him and I guess his free spirit found that a better set-up. He always greeted us though and often, other residents found Gumi or me, seeming to be chatting to a boundary wall- till they found Anthony sprawled on it and meowing away.
We knew where he hung out and always kept an eye out for him and ear out for his very distinctive meow. I thought that, in him leaving the house, I had let go, and as long as he was happy, what else mattered. Three years went by.
In the beginning of April 22, Anthony was found with a severely necrosed, maggot-infested wound, which we thought was a result of him fighting. The two other extremely kind families who looked after him, reached out to me as I had a cage and we needed that to get him to the vet. For two weeks or so, we did all we could to get him treated and better-there was a possibility that his front left limb would be amputated-but we were ready to get him back on the other three. Barring one day of extreme inactivity, Anthony seemed to be getting better, eating well, and conversing with us a lot! My child was home and I wanted to get him well.
We had sought a second opinion and found an extremely capable and caring vet, who was extending the best possible care to Anthony. With the help and support of many friends, we were gearing up for this amputation and continued care, when some horrible information was broken to us- Anthony in fact had been a victim of an acid attack and his injuries were far more severe than apparent. He was in very bad shape indeed-but given that he was fighting back, there was a chance that surgery would save him. The other option of euthanizing him was discussed and rejected- as the friend who very kindly came along to the vet said-if there’s any chance he can live, why take that away.
We did ok his surgery but the very next morning, I had to, in fact, take that mind-numbing call -Anthony had gone into shock and his body could not take surgery. We reached him and held him-my daughter, Gumi, Mrs. Dhar who used to feed him, and me- as he was given the injection to relieve him of his agony. When I think of the heinousness of the act that caused his death and seeing him go-I blank out. Yes, I’ve talked about it, complained about it. But it sits within me and always will- that a human being cruelly destroyed something so precious and so harmful.
As I write this, I can somewhere hear his gentle, baby-like meow. I remember the kitty who snuggled on my lap as I had tea, in the evenings. The chatty cat who, with his brother hogged my blankets. Their stretched out naps in summer.
Anthony-a chatty cat, loving gentle soul of purr and fur who I loved. An who loved me back.
Seeing him bloom in my garden gives me a soupcon of happiness. I hope he’s in a better place.
Jayesh Bhai Jordaar
Jayesh Bhai Jordaar deserves a jordaar, jaw dislodging lafa (Gujju speak for thappad) on its banal, insensitive handling of a horrible, cruel, practice and the violence and misogyny women face every day.
They decided to make a film about a cause- female infanticide. They figured they wanted to keep it light…..and ended up trivialising a very serious issue into a nonsensical farce. What started out (not very promisingly) as the struggle of a spineless Jayesh trying to save his wife from a seventh(!) abortion, ended up on the note of the importance of exchanging “pappies”(Hindi speak for kisses) and being polite.
The elders blithely discuss snuffing out life as if it’s a diseased organ. Reminiscent of the worse kind of 80’s cinema, the naaris are either hard as stone or abla as hell-their idea of a support group is to huddle in the night and cry.
The sarpanch’s idea of solving eve-teasing is to blame the fragrance of soap used by women tantalising the men, so the women are no longer permitted to use soap!
The attempts at showing the husband as supportive and modern are thinner than toilet paper. The only time he actually makes sense is when he threatens to cut off the family jewels if his wife is not spared. After 6 abortions, it’s the very least he can do. And yes- frequently, women do ACTUALLY want to cut the family jewels off –get some peace.
There are utterly stupid scenes where Jayesh has to hit his wife because miles away, said wife’s brother is hitting Jayesh’s sister.
A pathetic attempt at messaging is about a village in Haryana with no women and those wrestlers pledging to protect women and give them a safe haven.
And these are just some of the things spectacularly wrong with this drivel. All the attempts at positive messaging fall woefully short.
The only accurate depiction is the woman being hunted to be killed- yes that’s pretty much how it would feel to have your baby aborted. How it feels to be hit. How it feels to be teased.
Really Aditya Chopra? YRF? Ranveer Singh? Boman Irani? Ratna Pathak Shah? This is what you make in this century? No, your messaging is NOT clear. It’s botched up, insensitive, hollow and you have probably caused more damage than good.
Disappointing. Sick.
Haan Ji
Me Time
Talking to you was me time.
A break from the frenetic pace.
for me to be me.
To unwind
A space to share.
And care.
For someone other than my cares.
The days I didn’t
Weighed heavy on me.
The days I did,
Were happy indeed
In my heart I made it big
Seeking perhaps an ‘us’.
My head though persistently whispered.
Are you sure?
Have you thought it through?
It’s not him.
He hasn’t said much.
It’s you.
Only you.
I listened the other day.
When I argued away.
And heard . And said.
It’s me.
Only me.
Not you.
Not us.
I hurt.
The return of the Daily (B) Log-29/10/20 Cats
“One cat just leads to another.” – Ernest Hemingway
‘Tis true. Until May 2017, there were very few cats in my life and those there were of the nodding neighborhood acquaintance type. The odd stray ignoring me as it went it’s feline way.
In June 2017, two kittens were adopted to quell the ceaseless clamour for pets from the offspring.Why cats? Coz they were easier to look after among other reasons.
Thus, Annie and Lyla entered our lives- and we discovered only much later that they were Anthony and Luke and for years , we had exhibited great modern thinking and had gender fluid cats.
The cats themselves though had had enough. While we used to let them out regularly and then bring them back by casting the lures of chicken ,they were clearly done with regular baths and the soft life.
Both of them took off in the summer of 2019 to discover the world and no doubt, sow their wild oats. Luke we never saw again but I firmly believe that Lucy, our dog, channels his cake and baked goods loving soul.
Anthony we meet regularly. He also drops by for rest and recuperation after particularly nasty fights. Is cosseted, fed and then he shakes off the maternal fussing and goes off again. If you ever see me ostensibly talking to a wall or a lane or a gate, it’s Anthony and I catching up around the said spaces-he’s not always visible in the shadows but I firmly and largely am.
These two always had friends visiting and lurking in the kitchen balcony and one of them landed up with her brood. 2 gingers and two tabby-gingers. Utter rascals and constant entertainment.
So two led to five in the balcony and many visiting.
As this lot grew up, they left the nest too and went wandering. One of them, while expecting, decided that our ob-gyn was the best and the food not half bad. So three more….
We are now firmly and I think irrevocably the cat crazy family and the ultimate proof is that we are told cat stories, gifted apparel and such embellished with cats and the blame for every cat-as-trophe in the locality can potentially be laid at our door-we like cats, we feed them, we talk to them on the road-ergo-we must have incited them.
The chap you see in the photo is one of the three. His sister broke her leg so didn’t want to leave them at the risk of being hit and shooed. Thus their mum and they reside in one room. With Lucy regularly chasing the mom amidst hissy-spitty scratchy fireworks. With these three kittens, she just tries to play and it’s all rather sweet-except I am the zookeeper of a circus.
These three have discovered the offsprings soft toys as well as the joys of bags, cartons and anything that rustles. Great fun to watch and tiring to tidy up!
In addition to these, I have met cats at my workplaces, during holidays and clearly am being monitored as part of some sort of Cat Scan network…
Why the cat story today? It’s apparently National Cat Day in USA and seemed like a good idea to celebrate it here too. Yes?
Good meowt then.
Hotel Broadway- The Thespian
The Daily (B) Log-19/10/20-Fixtures in a house are exactly like a workforce
I have this little quirk that I never get all malfunctioning fixtures in my house repaired. Because that utopian situation never lasts. One chap or the other is ALWAYS out of order.
The most recent example-yesterday, the electrician fixed the geyser and the lights in the kitchen. So for about 5 minutes, everything electrical was working…. not, admittedly at their optimum ( one fan either goes supersonic or snail…. regulator knows only two speeds, bunked the other classes).
This morning, the door bell stopped working. QED.
I of course, will not let taps drip. But just as one drippy fellow was fixed, his pal in the kitchen decided he needed attention. And when ALL these buggers work, what do you know-the plumbing of an entire bathroom needs changing!
As for handles-the ones on the chests of drawers came off so often, I’ve just put in braided rope through the holes and tied it. Simpler and cheaper than the carpenter, who charges an arm and a leg (almost saws them off) and the moment he leaves, a hitherto immovable handle falls apart like Meena Kumari.
Like a workforce. Everyone operates at different speeds, some just languish and one or two people are always on leave.
It still chugs along. So, I guess, will my makaan. Though I think very fondly of tents..
The Daily (B) Log-18/10/20-Flat out Tyred
A productive day involving shopping, errands and a bloody flat tyre.
Truly grateful to Deepak Mishra and On Prakash at Ambience Mall, Gurgaon for changing it for me.
The shopping was fun but billing at H&M has aged me visibly…. they wanted everyone to download their app and get 15℅ off. Except, the billing counter is not the best place to do so because it adds 5 minutes of download and wave at cashier’s face time. Quite gah.
Thus, between traipsing around two markets and thereafter at a mechanic’s getting the flat fellow fixed, I am tired.
And happy. Met some animals today and as always, they add so much joy.The kitten of course is a resident in my res.
Signing off sleepily now. A new week of potential beckons…. and I have to regain the youth lost at H&M’s billing counter.
Ta people.
The Daily (B)Log-17/10/20- Nine Days of Posturing Piety
The first navratra today, as announced by Kal Nirnay, the celestial set up , innumerable ads and several whatsapp forwards through the day.
At the outset, I am a great admirer of the Devi and this post does not intend to disrespect her.
It might offend some humans though.
Twice every year, a vast majority of people-men and women, don a mien of alarming piety, renounce their sharab and kabab, allegedly as a sign of respect and deep devotion to the Devi-she of 9 avatars,several hands and extreme coolness; nurturer, lover, care-taker, destroyer of evil.
There are musical all nighters as a tribute to her. Fruits, potatoes, sago, buckwheat and other non-grain foodstuffs find their glory. Different states have their own rituals and practices to get into a state about navratri.
Essentially to pay obeisance to A Woman.
And constantly, the earthly incarnation is being subjected to horrors beyond belief.One is getting raped in some part of the country, another is being beaten up. Some don’t even make it past foetus stage and others are buried alive at birth. Another can have acid thrown on her for saying no to unwelcome advances and yet another is groped in a busy street. I am not even getting into the countless ways in which they are repressed, their spirit shackled, their voices drowned out.
The list is endless. And the guy who groped her, could be sporting a red-chunri , bandana style and shouting jai mata di with fervour, but not really making the connection-the girl whose space you violated- is a woman worthy of the respect you are according to the Devi-vanquisher of evil.And you, disgusting eve-teaser, groper, beater-up, rapist are vile vermin who actually does need to be stepped on.
So you know- the true measure of the shakti of your bhakti is in how you treat the women around you. Give on the stupid behaviour, not the food and beverages. The one astride the tiger will be a lot happier if the ones around you are………and well, if not, let’s hope there’s a Chandika around too.
On that militant note- all the ladies out there- WE are ALL goddesses. Nurturing, caring, protecting, educating and slaying beings.
Believe it.Live it.
Jai Mata Di for now.
needstotalk 